LISTEN TO ME!!! Our opinions are fashioned by personal experiences. But there are somethings I want to say to everyone about sexual abuse.

To the victims of sexual abuse: God hates the wickedness that has happened to you. He’s angry at the one that hurt you. Be assured that he will punish sin. He loves you. He has compassion for you. He wants to hold you in his arms and cry with you. You were not created to handle the evil in this world. I understand the depth of your hurt that goes beyond the physical leaving scars on your spirit and in your soul. But I know that Jesus can and will heal you. You were created to be loved and cherished. Please don’t turn to another source for comfort. The numbness offered by drugs and alcohol are temporary and cause additional hurt. Please accept the loving hand that Jesus is offering you today. God loves you, and I love you.

To the unrepentant pedophile: Your pleasure isn’t worth the damage you cause. Children remember, and so does their Savior. God hates the wicked acts you’ve committed. You have harmed the apple of God’s eye. His punishment is greater than any judge on Earth. Fear God and repent. If not, you will be forever tormented in hell with no chance of forgiveness.
To the pedophile sick at his own actions: Is your pleasure worth a lifetime of hurt? Seek professional help. You cannot overcome this temptation on your own. Stay away from children. We are all human and we all fail. But if you fall off the wagon, a child’s life is destroyed. Jesus can help you, if you let Him. Confess your sins and He is faithful and just to forgive you.
To the parents or caretakers of abuse victims: Wrap your arms around the child and say, “I beleive you.” No matter the hassle. No matter the public embarrassment. No matter the ridicule stand by the victim. DO NOT ask them to drop the charges. DO NOT ask them to just forget about it.DO NOT try to convince them they imagined the abuse. Victims need your support. They need your strength. If you don’t handle the legalities and the devastation caused by abuse, you are telling the victim they don’t matter. Their pain doesn’t matter. Their future doesn’t matter. DO seek help for the victim. You can’t understand the depth of pain they are processing. They need professional counselling.
To the parents of a young perpetrator: This is not your fault. This is an evil attack and your child needs help to overcome these unnatural urges. The problem won’t go away. Unchecked, your child’s behavior will get worse. Seek professional help. Alert the authorities. The best thing a parent can do for a child is to admit their flaws and help repair them.
To adults living with the shame of unreported abuse: I’m sorry. You don’t have to feel alone any longer, because I am here for you, and God is here for you. He can heal you from the horrid nightmares. He can heal you from your fear of intimacy. He can heal the hatred you’ve harbored for so long. Please, cry out to Jesus. Let Him will restore your soul.
To the women watching from the sidelines: Don’t judge us. Many victims lash out in their pain. Young girls become promiscuous. Some turn to alcohol and drugs to numb the pain. Help us. Love us. Remind us that our bodies were made to be cherished. Teach us that we have value. Tell us that Jesus loves us. Show us that we can overcome evil by God’s goodness.
To the men who are silent: Speak for us by teaching boys and young men that we are to be treasured. Love us by demanding that the world respect our bodies. Protect us by calling out suspicious behavior before it turns to abuse. Erase the gray lines between a man’s natural desire and perversion by creating safe boundaries for yours and other men interactions with women. DO NOT remain silent. Downplaying sexual abuse, refusing to discuss it, or protecting the perpetrator is saying the victims ARE NOT important. Our feelings don’t matter. Our nightmares. Our struggle to forgive ourselves and the ones who’ve hurt us. Stand up and be the man God created you to be. Do your job. Provide for us. Love us. Protect us. 


Choosing the Battle

There are many enemies around us. There is the enemy of homelessness. There is the enemy of child abuse. There is the enemy of addiction, fornication, and other sins. We as individuals can never battle every enemy. But we must do something. What?
In I Chronicles 14, after Saul’s death and David was anointed King, the Philistines came near and taunted David. There were challenging his reign. Testing him to see how strong his kingdom was.
Isn’t that just like the devil? He flaunts the hurting and the abused in our face and taunts, “Help them if you can?”
David, wise king that he was, inquired of the Lord. Notice that he didn’t rely on someone else to speak to God, but David knew how to contact God directly. We need that kind of relationship with our Savior. With God’s approval, David whipped the Philistines. He didn’t just win the battle. He won big. As a victory celebration, he burnt their gods with fire.
Yet the Philistines returned to taunt him again. Now a lot of us—myself included—would recognized the enemy, remembered our previous victory, and stormed into battle. But David knew that just because the enemy is raging doesn’t mean he should engage him.
Sometimes, God doesn’t want us to fight.
Sometimes, He fights for us.
And sometimes He has a specific battle plan He wants us to carry out.
Such as in this case. Upon inquiring of the Lord the second time, David followed God’s instructions, and waited by the Mulberry Trees—until God gave the signal. David showed trust in God by obeying His command. As a result, he won not only the battle, but the won the war against the enemy.
To many times, we rush into battle without waiting for God’s signal. We don’t give Him a chance to put His battle plan into motion. And when we lose, we think God failed us.
Not so! If we are going to be victorious against the enemy, we must fight only the battles God allows us, and we must follow His battle plan.
Is the enemy taunting you?

If so, inquire of the Lord, and follow his instructions. Invite me to your victory celebration by commenting below.

Man’s Word or God’s Truth?

There are godly men and women in this world. Unfortunately, there are some evil men and women as well. Many souls have been scarred by evil actions. As with most cases, God gets the blame.
God’s word and man’s word are different. God isn’t a human. He isn’t accountable for mankind’s actions or neglect.
However, God is aware of our hurts, and He has made provision to heal us completely.
The book of Genesis tells us of creation. It also tells that after God created man, He gave man a commandment.
God told Adam that if he ate of the tree of knowledge of good and evil then Adam would die. (Genesis 2:17) But Eve thought that God said you can’t eat of it, nor touch it or she would die. (Genesis 3:2-3) At this time, Adam stood with her, and didn’t bother to correct her thinking. Perhaps, he was the one who added to God’s word and told Eve that they couldn’t touch the fruit.
Because of this, a lot of people (and I was once one of them) blame Adam for Eve’s sin. However, upon closer look we see that after the deed was done, God spoke directly to Eve in verse 13 and 16. This tells me that the communication line between God and Eve was already open.
Eve didn’t have to go through Adam to have access to God. She could have clarified the commandment with one question. But instead of depended on God and God’s word. She depended on man and man’s word.

Man’s word fails. God’s word never fails.

Today, people are wrongly judging God’s faithfulness by a man’s or another woman’s word. We are deceived into thinking that God is a liar, God is abusive, God is unfaithful, and God doesn’t care because of human action or inaction. But thankfully, God is not a man that He should lie.
Another fact to consider is that prior to their sin, God told both Adam and Eve that they may eat of every fruit tree that had seeds. (Genesis 1:28-29) Since God doesn’t lie, and His word never changes, we can conclude that the fruit from The Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil was seedless. (The first seedless fruit was created not by man’s ingenuity but by God in the Garden of Eden.)
Think of a wild plum tree. Think of all the little sprouts around it. That’s probably why God created the tree seedless. He wanted only one of this type of tree. This also distinguished the tree from the other edible fruits. 
Adam and Eve knew which fruit was forbidden.

Men and women, husbands and wives, fathers and mothers have a distinctive purpose and a specific role to play in our life, but none of these are gods. None of these are Saviors. All of these are human. And all of these make mistakes. Every life has been touched by evil in some way. Yes, it hurts, and yes it affects us. But we can’t judge God’s love and compassion by human failure. And, it’s time to stop blaming our own failures on the inadequacies of others.
Instead, let’s use the communication lines that were opened on Calvary. Talk to God. Tell Him your hurts. Let Him heal you.
Remember that your heavenly Father loves you unconditionally. He sent Jesus to save you from the evils of sin. The Holy Ghost was sent with comfort and strength to help us not only survive this world, but to live victoriously.

Have you talked to your Savior today?

Our Hugs Belong to Jesus

Some months ago, Dylan Farrow wrote an open letter about the abuse of her father, Woody Allen. Because of his celebrity status, the letter was published in the NY Times and received a lot of media attention.
But what about the unheard voices? Voices of little girls and boys around the globe suffering in silence?
I have talked with many sexual abuse victims. Their stories are all very achingly similar. A friend or relative that they have been taught to love and respect breaks trust and touches them inappropriately. Those awkward touches escalate over time into sexual assault. We have all heard horrifying stories.
As a mother, I asked myself; how can I protect my child? Of course, I’ve the import question. “Has anyone touched you inappropriately?”
Then one day while grocery shopping, we see a distant relative. He’s an older gentlemen and he asks her for a hug. 
I watch as she grimaced and endured an awkward embrace. Me, being a paranoid mom, watched his hands very carefully, but both touched only her shoulders.
Yet, she clearly didn’t want the hug.
When we were back in the car, I asked, “Why did you hug him, if you didn’t want to?”
Her answer astounded me. She said, “I didn’t want to be rude.”
My 10 year old daughter accepted a hug that she clearly didn’t want, because I had taught her to be nice. 
Right there in the parking lot. I assured her that her body was special. A gift from God. And she didn’t have to hug or kiss anyone.
It wasn’t rude.
But it was rude of people to claim her affections without permission.
As a mother, I’ve often struggled with ways to protect my children from sexual predators without revealing more sexual knowledge than their immature minds can process. 
But here is my answer.
Their bodies belong to God. And no one has a right to touch them without their permission. If someone makes you feel uncomfortable, it’s okay to tell them that your hugs belong to Jesus.
That’s not rude.
That’s smart.
That’s safe.
Later that night, I wondered again why she didn’t want to the man to hug her. So I asked.

Her answer, “He has bad breath.”